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It’s been a little over 30 days since I started my 400km in 30day challenge and it was a horribly hectic period filled with running, cycling, swimming, illness, injury and an unfortunate visit up north. Needless to say I failed in the task but I did manage to turn my disappointment into a number of positives… and here’s the numbers

I walked over 95km. I cycled nearly 130km. I ran over 225km (including the Valentines Challenge 10mile and 10km Virtual run). 7km of breast stroking (I mean swimming!)

However, I was 175km short of my running target but I’ll go again in June and aim for the full 400km.

Next up is the St Peters Way Ultra and I’ve stupidly been running this evening in my Merrell Barefoots without socks and skinned the tops of my feet! Silly bloody me – still it’s Monday they should hopefully be healed by Sunday. As Eric Idle said ‘always look on the bright side of life’, after all it is only running

400km in 30 days isn’t actually that much and I had started it not so much as a running challenge but more a Hip scoring exercise, just how much could my hip handle? Well the answer to that was ‘not much’. And I’m going to need to figure out just what my body can handle as this is a year that I can’t afford the time off for surgery or things of that nature plus my physio has been instructed to just help keep me on the road – he thinks I’m mad by the way.

With that in mind I haven’t run since Friday in an effort to rest my hip and burning shin. I’m going to ease off the big distance and go gentle for a week or so and build back up, although there will be a slow 10km done tonight to complete my Virtual Run.

With the St. Peter’s Way Ultra just a couple of weeks away it’s important that I get my hip as strong as possible or at least as pain free as possible, I know I’m capable of completing it even in the event of being injured but with 2 UTMB points on offer I’m keen to put in a real shift and run a decent time. But this all remains to be seen.

In other news I was leaving the train station on Friday night and a chap tapped me on the shoulder and asked about my trainers. I told him where I’d gotten them, gave him as much advice as possible and then discovered we would both be running the SDW50 and live about 5 minutes from each other – weird and cool.

I did also manage to pull a 15.30 4km – which makes me pretty happy but the continued accuse of my body makes me much less happy. Still it’s the price we pay for racing glory.

Finally before I go I shall update briefly my race status and announce that. ‘Yes’ I managed to book my place for the Winter 100 with Centurion Running, this has been on my mind for months – the need to book my place! Therefore on a bright shiny Saturday morning I sat waiting for entries to open and at about 10.51(ish) they did. With a urgency not seen since the last someone said there is only one Kit Kat left in the cupboard I made my application. Approved. I was in the Winter 100 – phew. It was at this point that not only was I was raving on about how wonderful it will be to run in an epic 100 ultra in beautiful English countryside but I also updated my blackboard of races and here I saw a problem.

No Marathon.

I quickly returned to the computer, connected to my friend Google and slammed in some variables. Within seconds Google was suggesting races all over but it kept coming back to one particular one the ‘Kent Roadrunner Marathon’. Now as some of you will know I ran this race last year and so I was a little hesitant but Google came to my aid.

‘I’ve searched this bad boy out for you, you enjoyed this race, you know the course, you know people doing it, you like the medal, its big and it jingles, plus you weren’t happy with your time last year, maybe you could go back and do a bit better.’

I could hear Googles words in my ears and suddenly I found myself signing up for a race that I’ve already done – not something I am in the habit of doing and there was a nagging in my mind even as I paid my £33 entry fee about running 17 laps or so round a track (again) and then I heard it.

In the background Google was cackling at me, ‘remember UltraBoy, you’ll have run 42laps round that very same track just three weeks earlier as you do the National 100’.

Shit burgers, Google had screwed me like a $5 hooker – damn it. Too late now, but still the Kent Roadrunner is a favourite of mine and did really enjoy the day last year, so lets hope for more of the same and a slightly quicker time.

So there we go Ultra number 7 and marathon number 1 of 2014 booked. Still looking for the perfectly timed beginners Triathlon though. Hmmm. Have a good running week chaps.

Pain, pain, pain, pain and more pain. The problem with pain when you run is that the bugger hurts.

Yesterday my back had been really sore which I assumed was a flare up of my back and hip trouble caused by my cycling on Sunday. Regardless of this I thought that a few kilometres wouldn’t hurt – how wrong can you be! Less than a dozen strides in I could feel my left foot smacking the ground rather than brushing it as it normally does and by the time is reached Marylebone High Street I felt like stopping. However, it was also freezing cold and had I stopped it would have been a chilly trundle down to the station and so I pushed on through the city, even making a sprint for the train but the throbbing in my hips, back and annoyingly my shin was hideous. I’ve run ultra marathons and been in less pain afterwards! However, despite the pain I did manage to run but I do need to reflect on the possibility that I’m over training and perhaps some more time on the yoga mat and in the pool might benefit me.

Toes: looks at us

UltraBoy: I can’t, you disgust me

Toes: we do so much for you

UB: but you also ruin my life

Toes: how can you say that? We drag you round races, help you stand, wiggle provocatively in the direction of good looking ladies and even curl up when you’re feeling sick

UB: All true but it’s the other things like…

Toes: like what???

UB: well I was just going to say…

Toes: oh the blisters?

UB: well for a start

Toes: your fault, inadequate preparation

UB: yes but second biggest toe grew too long which is why it rubs, some responsibility must be yours for that? A failure to stop growing is…

Toes: you’re now blaming me for growing in proportion?

UB: well…

Toes: no, no – let’s explore this

UB: I’m just saying your disgusting
Toes: so what you’re saying is that your inadequate foot preparation, your toe waxing, your near constant toenail biting, wearing inappropriate footwear and your over running are in some way my responsibility? The fact your toes bleed each night is something you think is a problem with me and not you and that you have bits of skin so hard that you have to dig them out of my like some cack handed surgeon? You UltraBoy are unreal! Long before you became a long distance runner you had the worlds worst toes – running just gives you an excuse to blame me!

UB: but…

Toes: don’t interrupt, your toes are in full rant mode – which is spectacular because we have no mouth through which we can speak but still we demand a bit more respect, perhaps even a visit to the doctor so that those ingrowing toenails can be removed, so that all that epic hard skin can be treated and so that when you look at me, when you gaze down at your two little buddies found constantly at the bottom of your legs you think, ‘they aren’t bad’.

My toes had a point but I’m a childish and vengeful and so sat in my bathroom I yanked at my big toe and pulled out the enormous heap of dead skin and nail that had been digging deep into my toe for the last three months – blood spurting across the floor I raised the sharp, tough mess of skin and nail aloft and cried a bit.

I need to go to a doctor and insist that all my nails are removed as I think this may solve a lot of my toe running problems – but it might leave them unprotected. If anyone has managed to reach the end of this blog post then I’d be keen to hear from runners who have elected to have their toenails removed on a permanent basis and about their post removal running experiences. My toes are furious I’m contemplating this but I believe it’s in their best interests.

Finally below is the sharpness that’s been digging into the side of my big toe for three months. This is fair warning – dead skin alert!!! Dead nail alert!!!!

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Doesn’t look like much does it? Let me guarantee it has hurt like a bugger every time I’ve run. My toes should be glad I pulled it out!

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I’m lying in the cold and the wet, I can feel blood on my leg, my beloved Asics running tights are ruined and all I can think about is not, have I broken my leg but, shit have I just pulled out of the C2C. 8 days before the race and I’m lying motionless wondering if I have just ruined my chances of grabbing my first UTMB point of the season. Roll on 8 days and 43miles later and the answer is that, no I didn’t.

I rolled out of bed at about 4.30am partly because Project ThunderClunge needed some preparation before it could make its move this early in the day. I showered and put the final bits of kit together in my bag and we headed from the Garden of England up to Buckinghamshire where we met up with the other runners at the Shoulder of Mutton pub in Wendover. It was a bit like organised chaos but it kinda worked, one queue, lots of levels and a shedload of bacon baps. The worst part about the start was the man at Wendover train station – I asked for a car parking ticket and he issued me with a stern gaze and told me that the station was intended for rail passengers only. My view was that he was getting a full days parking ticket for not much more than an hours usage, this meant I had to go scrabbling round for change which I managed to get through the purchase or coffee and bacon for the OH. Parking sorted I lined up for my number, changed my emergency telephone and promptly left my coffee somewhere I couldn’t remember putting it. At this point I spotted the running top of @totkat and briefly said hello, neither of us knowing each other’s names she greeted me with the ‘hello Ultraboy’. I had stuff to do though and promised to catch up later which is what we did but prior to that I had a toilet visit. Two toilets exist in the pub and in the first of these options we were warned that it was a bit like the bog of eternal stench and this was correct – despite my need I couldn’t use it and waited for the other still functional and not full to the brim loo. Racing out of the loo I picked up @totkat again and had a brief chat about things, shoes and the like and then headed out to find the OH who had just left the front of the pub with my two hounds. Strangely though she had been stood within spitting distance of @cat_simpson_ who it was finally a delight to meet. Again a bit of a chat and then away – we both had stuff to do. But my tweet ups weren’t quite over and I was recognised for the stupidity of my Dirty Girl gaiters by the lovely @J0ERUNS – what a great runner, the man is a legend and I was grateful of the opportunity to meet him.

The start was pushed back to about 8.40 and I found myself at the front which was not where I wanted to be and so I pushed my way back and took up my customary position at the slow end of the race.

My aim was to complete between 8hrs 30 and 9hrs 15 but in my head I was hoping for 8hrs 30 and this was my final thought before the race started, I clicked the go button on my Suunto Ambit 2 and kicked off in my Hoka Stinson Evo. Now I’ll mention briefly my Suunto, I had loaded full mapping of the race on board and I intended to follow the little arrow the whole way – full review will follow shortly – but the huge crowd of runners all huddled together and we made me pleasant, accurate progress through some stunning countryside. Wendover soon disappeared behind us and we made our way through the first of the muddy fields. The weather was fine, beautiful January day and as we came across the first of the hills you felt as though was going to be both a very friendly and pleasant affair.

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I was trundling along to CP1, at this point still over taking people, going too quickly, dancing through the mud when I met a lovely runner, I’m going to call her Sophie as I think that was her name, but you meet a lot of people running ultras and names get lost in their stories. She was a genuinely fascinating runner who had completed the MdS, had been evacuated from Cambodia to Thailand when she fell into a coma! she made my life look dull and I’ve had a reasonably interesting life! Anyway with her at my side I was able to push on and floated into CP1 in 1hr 20minutes – 90 second stop and then off. Sophie was getting into her stride and I wished her well as I needed to bring my pacing down a little bit (she was going to be a fast finisher). Checkpoint 2 would also be the last point at which I would see my OH and my two hounds but that didn’t really matter, she needed to focus on Project ThunderClunge and actually that made me address some issues, the primary was, ‘what do I really need for the rest of the race’. What I didn’t address was what do I not need for the rest of the race, therefore after enjoying the best of the views in Buckinghamshire I thundered along the final road and up into CP2. Despite being a trail run there is a lot of running on pathways with C2C and this was generally fine but it meant that your footwear choice was very important and the route between CP1 and CP2 and equally CP2 and CP3 was varied and changeable – I was glad of my Hoka.

What CP2 brought with it was also the realisation that my knee had not healed properly at all, the fluid that I had recognised a few days earlier had not gotten any better and combined with the calf compression I was in a lot of knee pain which was translating to my time. I hit CP2 just after 3hrs but at nearly 18 miles in I was still confident I’d come in on time. My OH though was concerned about the knee and wondered if it wasn’t more sensible to stop – as a medical person she was worried and as my OH she was worried as she was about to head back to Kent.

I kissed her goodbye, drank Lucozade and headed off into the wilds. The next few miles were good fun and the Lucozade had given me a lift that I really needed as a lack of breakfast was really showing. I added to this a number of delicious Sainsbury’s sugar strings which helped me spike my sugar levels.

CP2 to CP3 also gave me access to a couple of lovely American guys ( Michael and Richard @broferd ). Michael was in his first ultra and his first run over 16 miles but in his corner he had a family history of Ultra Marathons as his dad had finished the Western States no less than three times and he was wearing one of his dads 1980s running tops, he was a great guy. Richard too was a great runner, inspiring, fun and provided excellent motivation to keep me going through some of the stretches along the canal and we spent much of the next 10 miles or so jockeying for position. Also between CP2 and CP3 I met Martin. He was running with two other guys and was in his third ultra but had DNFed in his first two, I found him an interesting and engaging runner who clearly had the motivation and was keen to run to the finish but the two people he was running with seemed more to be bringing him down and hearing their ‘motivational’ style was both depressing me and angering me. I really wanted to tell them to ‘fuck off’ but that wasn’t in the spirit of ultra running. Thankfully having looked at the results there is no Martin in the DNF list and there is a Martin who within 9hrs 30 which was his aim the last time I spoke to him and so I hope he is very proud of the achievement.

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I digress, CP2 to CP3 also brought my favourite race surprise because at mile 24 was @abradypus who is a bit of a running legend in her own right. Demanding sweaty manhugs and photographs was the least I could offer her for simply being there to cheer us along, I should point out that she wasn’t there just for me, she was there for the plethora of other Twitter runners that were running C2C.

The canal brought with it something I hadn’t expected which was a hint of boredom, the problem was that a) it was flat and b) there was no real scenery. This wouldn’t have been a problem had it occurred at the beginning with the bigger, slippery and dirty trails in the second half but that would have been something to get excited about, to look forward too. The canal felt like a truly metal challenge – the distance wasn’t the issue but seeing a never ending, ceaseless path of water in front of you meant you felt every single step. So although the path was simple to navigate it was not easy to negotiate.

Passing through the final checkpoints there is little to report really besides a worsening situation with my knee, jovial crew and a pleasant evening in terms of temperature and rain. As I approached Little Venice realising I had missed out on the 9hour mark by about 6 minutes was soul destroying but I managed to limp across the finish line and waiting for me was the ever wonderful @abradypus and because she had not long finished herself @totkat – thank you to both for providing support, both at the finish line and at the pub after.

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I’m glad I did this one, it was good fun and gave me an early start to the season – something I really missed out on last year when I didn’t run my first race until March. I’ve found there has to be a reason to run a race and the one here is that I enjoyed it (for the most part). You can forgive the running along the towpath because the first 27 miles are really good fun. You will enjoy the party atmosphere that was everywhere you looked, it wasn’t a nervous race – first timers through to highly experienced ultra runners were on show and all felt welcome. The pub at the beginning was a great start line and I’m advised the bacon sandwich was delicious. The map book was pretty decent, which surprised me as I had heard criticism of earlier years versions but compared to some of the directions I’ve had this was amazing. There were enough hills to make you think that this was a challenge but not enough for you to think you’ve just run up a mountain and despite the weather the land was torn up enough for the energy to be thoroughly drained from your legs by the time you got to the towpath. I would highly recommend this race whatever your ultra experience. All of these good things are supplemented by a nice T-shirt and a wonderfully thick but not too big medal. Sign up now (well when it opens for 2015!)

I’d like to finish though with a thank you to all the support crew, all the people on Twitter and on Facebook who provided me with encouragement throughout the day and especially my OH and the hounds, this medal and this race are very much dedicated to you.

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Asics full length running tights
November 2010 – January 2014
Taken before their time by the Shorne Woods Trail.
RIP my old buddy, you deserve it, you ran long, you ran short, you just ran. Thanks.

Please note, they aren’t being thrown away, I’m hiding them from my OH in my box(es) of running memories which are hiding in the loft

I seem to have developed this habit of ruining myself before a race. My Achilles went a week before the Snowdonia Marathon, my back went just before the Thames Gateway 100 and I broke my foot on the White Cliffs 50 plus I’ve had puking fits at the Bewl Marathon and also the Windsor Trail Half Marathon. I thought it was just going to be 2013 but then on the 2nd day of 2014 I actually cut open my leg – one week before the Country to Capital ultra. I wonder if there is something inside me that says ‘UltraBoy you don’t want to race, here let me fix that for you by knackering part of your body’ but then the few days before my heart speaks to me and says ‘don’t worry UltraBoy you’ll make it, it doesn’t matter if you are in pain, if your hips and back are knackered and your knee bleeding, you’ll make it because you’ve got heart’. This time next week I’ll be on my way at the C2C, I’ll be going slowly because the knee wound needs not to open up on the route and because my back and hips are about as buggered as buggered can be.

It looks like 2014 is going to pick up right were 2013 left off, still I’m pretty fired up and focused and looking for more ultras to run and maybe even a few marathons as I look to hit my 20th marathon+ race this year.

Funnily I haven’t raced for over 2 months and I’ve really missed it and don’t feel that the time off has done me much good, hence why I can’t avoid the start line for C2C, some people are destined to greatness in this race but I know I’m destined to mediocrity at C2C but I’ll be the best I can be in my own mediocrity.

Wish me luck runners and enjoy another weekend of racing yourself. Ciao.

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So I’d cycled the ten miles to my run, I’d locked the bike up, I’d strapped my bag on nice and tight and set the Suunto to go. 100metres, all fine on the track, 350metres, up the trail steps into the undergrowth and the mud, 750metres, tight cornering – use the tree to help balance me out, 800metres, fuck I’ve fallen and I’ce ripped my old favourite tights and I’m in a boatload of pain. My first thought was I’m in the middle of a forest and nobody around me, the second thought was I’m ten miles from home with no way back other than under my own steam, my third thought was, ‘shit if I’ve broken my leg then that’s the C2C out the window.

Thankfully I got up – ran back the way I came, took a quick look at the various cuts on my leg and saw the bleeding and made it back to the bike, lay there a little while and then raced like lightening all the way home. A lesson for us all, but mainly me, careful where you go running in these rather difficult conditions – if I were the kind of person who blames his shoes I’d say ‘naughty Merrell barefoots’ but I think that would be unfair they had been pretty good the rest of the adventure

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It’s that time again when runners the world over start looking back at their achievements in the last year, but I’m saving that for a blog post when I feel the need to improve my mood. I’m looking forward to 2014, it’s targets and what I can do to make them happen.

2014 is going to be a slightly different year to the last two, I’ve spent the last couple forcing my body over the line in as many races as was humanly possible – this has turned out to be about 50 races in one form or another (three ultra and four marathon distances included in the last year). However, 2014 has to be more refined as I discovered that during the last 12 months I’ve been suffering from a succession of injuries and this is as much to do with not enough training as it is to do with racing too much. Therefore, 2014 is to be the year of the ultra, Country to Capital will kick things off, followed by the St. Peter’s Way, then kicking on to the SDW50, staying with Centurion for the NDW100 and then with a bit of luck and a fair wind I’ll be adding in the UTMB inspired CCC at the end of August (surely much to the annoyance of my body after the efforts of the NDW100 three weeks earlier) and I will hopefully finish the year with the Saltmarsh 75 (the only nonUTMB qualifier) and back to centurion for the W100.

This is a good number of ultras and with consistent training and good form I’m hoping to qualify UTMB 2015 after my failure this year. The changes that might well be adopted to this list are that the CCC might be replaced by the Ring of Fire which would act as my first multi day event and I might not get a place in the CCC. And should I not get in to the W100 then I would consider the Saintelyon Ultra which looks amazing, though depending on when W100 runs I might go for both and risk my body a bit.

So my targets currently stand at the following

Complete a minimum of five ultra marathons
Qualify for the UTMB 2015
Improve training regime
Consider once again joining a running club
Bring my 5km time back under 20 minutes
One cycling event (at least)
One outdoor swimming event (at least)

On paper it all looks surprisingly easy but after just three ultras this year I am acutely aware of how much of a burden this is and with my body still not quite right (back and hips continuing to trouble me) it will be an even bigger challenge. What has dawned on me is the value of looking after my body and for the first time ever I’ve started doing Pilates and stretching regularly, rather than when I’m forced into it by my other half. I’m still not doing the eating clean thing though, I just can’t bear to eat vegetables, it just gives me the shivers and despite knowing that there are so many benefits to eating clean my mouth and mind just won’t let me do it – not even for a place in the UTMB.

Well that’s my list started, what about yours? Have you started to map out new targets for the next 12 months and what will keep you on the road? Happy running kids.

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