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Running ultra marathons is as much about your preparation as it is about the race itself, if you fail to turn up for the training then there is little chance of there being glory on race day. I’ve been in a bit of a constant lull over the last six months because of the increasing pain I have been suffering in my hips. At 2014s other completed ultras (Country to Capital and St. Peter’s Way) I’ve had other issues which have thankfully been more serious than the pain coming from around my middle, namely a split open leg at C2C and a chest infection at SPW. However, with increasing regularity the pain has become unbearable – especially when I look to push myself to beyond the 20 mile mark. This has meant that overall my training hasn’t been as thorough as it should have been and no amount of resting has offered any respite. Ultimately I’m now worried about running and thinking about my hips, and the more I think about them the more I’m likely to make an injury happen.

However, now with the SDW50 just a few days away I’ve finally booked in with a physio to see if they can grind my bones and muscles into enough shape to allow me to get through the race – I don’t need fixing at the moment I just need to remain strong enough to be on the trail. Funnily I’ve also finally started stretching and foam rollering on a consistent basis and while this is making a bit of a difference it’s probably not enough.

I’m fully aware that my entire body is a bit of a mess and I am falling apart but I’m committed to the challenges I’ve set myself, therefore April and May looks like a make or break time with three ultra distances in a month (albeit one of them a hiking challenge 96 in 36).

I’ve promised myself that if I get through the SDW50 (and WNWA96 and National100) I’ll get properly looked at and stop procrastinating, I might even accept whatever medicine that is thrown at me but for now, for this next race, I’m in a race against myself.

So can I finish the SDW50? The answer is ‘probably’ as I managed to finish the other two when I didn’t think it was possible. But do I want to make a fool of myself at this race? No of course I don’t – I want to finish well, probably in around 9hrs something would be nice but there’s the niggling feeling inside that says I should be grateful to come in under at just under 13 and a half hours.

If you’re running the SDW50 this weekend then best of luck and if you see me scrabbling in the dirt then please think kindly of me, perhaps even pat me on the back and tell me it’ll be over soon. Happy running.

Let me start off by explaining that the fear of FAT is not some sort of joke, the fear of FAT is my fear that there are certain factors in life that might overtake running. Family, Age and Time are the three things that send a bit of a chill down my spine and already I can hear the counter arguments that family make you richer in terms of heritage, immortality, etc and with age comes wisdom and that we must simply make time for the things we want to achieve. I believe all the counter arguments to the things I fear, however, fear of these things I have.

At 36 I’ve just acquired my second puppy and it’s exhausting – my family has grown by one (I already have one big puppy) and in the near future I am aware that my partner and her already stated ‘ticking biological clock’ are likely to want to start a family with a slightly less canine tint and more of a baby tint. This is fine in the grand scheme of things but the question it raises as a runner is how will this affect me? I’m already witnessing lots of tweets talking about the lack of training because of no babysitter or no energy or… well the reasons are many and varied. My ultra running often means I’m away from the house for relatively long periods of time when I run, it’s not like taking a half hour jog around the block or the 20 minutes I need to whip around the Parkrun course. A child might take away from the running and my key dreams of running the UTMB, UTMF and MdS (maybe WS100). Don’t get me wrong, extending my family is a lovely idea and I’m keen to do it but those centurion belt buckles are important to me and if I don’t start earning them now then being a good ultra runner might just pass me by – all of which leads me seamlessly into my second fear …

Age.

36 I’m fully aware is not old but I’m a few months from 37, I try to look after myself but I’m older, weight doesn’t shift as quickly, I spend more time stretching and keeping myself on the road as I do spend time on the road. On a bad week when knee, back, ankle and hip pain is bad I can be found languishing in a pit of my own making from years of overtraining and not looking after myself. If I could go back and tell the young UltraBoy what a difference looking after himself might make to his chances of running longevity then I would take that opportunity in a heartbeat. I’d tell him that running will become the thing that means the most to him and that actually ally that other crap, or life as some people call it, will carry on regardless of whether he runs. However, age has also given me appreciation for what I do have, it does make me grateful for the ability I have and it makes me savour it. I was at the Folkestone Coastal 10k a last year and there was a man running his final competitive race, he was 80 years old – I want to still be doing that, the only difference is that I don’t want to walk it, I would want to run it. So I guess I’m mindful of age because time can pass us by and I’m doubly conscious that my ability to even contemplate 100 mile ultra marathons is not infinite.

And so to time … ‘Time is a predator that stalks us all captain’ Star Trek Generations.

I’ve been working exceptionally long hours the last 6 months or so (well the last 15 years actually), coupled with the strain of being in a job I don’t like, the hours of this job killed my training and my attempt to complete the TG100 – I went into that ultra more exhausted than I have been in a very long time. I’m sat on a train this morning exhausted and as writing this I’m thinking that my hour long journey to London Bridge would be better used by getting some sleep. The arrival of a new puppy is adding an interesting dynamic with some through the night howling and all in all I wonder how I’ve fitted running into my daily routine. We all have our crosses to bear, I am fully aware of this but I’m keen to understand how the hell people manage to fit in running for ultra training. I already get up just after 5am, I never get home much before 8pm – I do tend to RunCommute where possible, I often need to start work again soon after arriving home and rarely get to bed before midnight or 1am and tend to be a crappy sleeper anyway. I have the upmost respect for the people who run before work, I see them tweeting and think ‘wow’ and the RunCommuters who push out 10 miles before most normal people are awake. RUNchers, mothers, fathers, Parkrunners, racers, jobbers, walkers, running clubbers you guys amaze me.

Solutions?
Ah, you didn’t think I’d write all this negative stuff and not have some solutions did you? Hmmm

1. New job, closer to home
This means that I’d have more time for a family, see more of the family I have, perhaps even have time to join a running club. My current daily commuting time (without running) is over 4hrs, often closer to 5hrs and those 5hrs could be better used.

2. Less hours
Over the summer I was working every possible second, laptops on the train, emails as I walked, at one point I didn’t sleep at all for 5 days in order that work was completed on time and to the correct standard.

3. Less rigid training
Go with the flow, find the time around things, look for opportunities and don’t let opportunity wait to find me

4. Eat better
Slow down the signs of ageing with an improved diet

5. Listen to advice
My partner, my physio, my body, etc. I can be stubborn and a bit of a fuckwit by listening to the advice of the people who care, or who know I might well benefit from some excellent pearls of wisdom.

6. Don’t give up
Nothing is impossible and everything can be reached by finding small compromises, especially for a fun runner like me. By remembering I do this because I love it I can break the shackles of my slightly creaky and worn body, I can find the time and I can have a family who appreciate me.

7. CaniX and a baby buggy with bloody big wheels
Take the family with you.

So there we go, I might fear FAT but FAT can be faced and with a reasonably sensible plan the future doesn’t have to mean the end of my running career just as it’s about to get into full swing.

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